27 October 2012 | Undecided and Unintelligent

I come here not to persuade the undecided voter, but to cast upon him the worst scorn and disdain that I can muster: what the hell is the matter with you?

Just how ignorant does a person have to be in order to proclaim himself "undecided" at this point in the presidential election? Where have you been? How is it possible to not even have the slightest inkling of who to vote for with everything that's been said, re-said, spun and re-spun? There's only one obvious conclusion: you are an idiot.

They say it's easier to catch flies with honey than with vinegar, and insulting people isn't a way to get them to see your point of view. But at this stage of American politics, there's no other way to make the point about what is going on here. Undecided voters are those treated by the media as people who are carefully weighing all points of view, taking the time to explore the issues and the records. This is complete bullshit. A cursory review of your choices is enough to put yourself in one column or the other. Undecided voters are not recalcitrant wise men who want to judge things carefully: they're the ones who are blissfully unaware of what's been going on for some time and who have undue influence (at least as far as the media is concerned) over the outcome of a race.

Let me make it easy: in the last two years, can you name one jobs bill that has been passed by Congress and signed by the President? I'll answer it for you: there are none. Not one jobs bill has made it out of the House of Representatives because since 2011, it's been controlled by the irresponsible fanatics of the Tea Party. Ah yes, let's mention these folks before going further. In 2010, the Democratic majority in both houses ended and an entire cadre of Tea Party loudmouths took over the House and put the Democrats with a slim majority in the Senate. Lots of screaming and spittle from the Tea Party folks who want government to be size of a postage stamp and the end of Obamacare, but not a single jobs bill. The Tea Party is the Republican Party, so that means that the GOP hasn't done anything meaningful but let Congressional freshmen vote over 30 times to repeal health care reform, shoot down jobs bills for vets and drive the country to almost default on its debt. Any of this sound vaguely familiar? Do you think, o undecided voter, that perhaps the party that is responsible for most of this bullshit might not have your best interests at heart?

Here's another thing: presidents do not make laws. Maybe you slept through your summer school civics class, but it's true: the executive branch does not create laws, Congress does. Oh, and by the way, Congress control the purse strings. That means all those bib-dribbling crybabies of the GOP who like to go on and on about out of control government spending? Well, that would be Congress, so that means that the Tea Party faction bears responsibility. Them and the rest of the GOP who busted the deficit with two unpaid for wars that you might have heard of: Iraq and Afghanistan. Almost a decade of fiscal irresponsibility but you are undecided about which party might do best to control the deficit and bring down spending. Maybe you also haven't heard that President Obama has reduced the massive deficit by $200 billion. Maybe you haven't heard that federal workers—the scourge of the right wing—have had their pay frozen in order to cut down spending. Even if this just rings the vaguest of bells, perhaps you might want to put two and two together about which party has done more to hurt American economic recovery.

Now, lest you think I am shilling for Barack Obama, guess again. My point is that if you're undecided at this point, you just have not been paying any attention and that means, you have no real grasp of basic facts or knowledge over choices that affect everyone living in this country. If you think being undecided makes you look wise or thoughtful, it doesn't: you're betraying your own ignorance, and you're going to drag everyone else down with you.